Monday, March 20, 2017

Donald Trump Absolutely Is Hitler Reincarnated (154 Percent Certain)

You may be inclined to not believe me, but I think it's possible that Donald J. Trump might be Adolf Hitler reincarnated. Fact is, I Googled "Donald Trump Hitler Reincarnated" and RESULTS WERE RETURNED!! 70,900 results in 0.64 seconds, to be precise. And most of them said YES, Donald Trump IS Hitler reincarnated. The "evidence is damning" the very first result says. So there you go, proof positive that people are saying Trump is Hitler reincarnated. And based on "evidence" (as per the first Google result).

"No one wants to admit it but facts are facts" the opening sentence of the article says. Let that sink in for a minute. Facts Are Facts. Donald Trump IS Hitler reincarnated.

[A story in] the Philly Daily News... draws comparisons between... Donald Trump and Adolf Hitler. Trump was asked on CNN's "New Day" whether or not this comparison bothered him at all. Trump's response was a simple and emphatic, "No".

...digging just a bit deeper, what Trump was really trying to communicate with his "no" becomes shockingly clear: Trump was not bothered by this comparison to Hitler because he is Hitler reincarnated into a new, and even more terrifying, form. Why else would such a normally outspoken man, a man running for president of The United States no less, have absolutely no comment when compared to the most vilified figure in human history? (Is Donald Trump Hitler Reincarnated? The Evidence Is Damning by Joe Durbin. Carbonated TV).

Carbonated TV says "from the serious to the hilarious, we bring you stories that matter". So, would the "Trump is Hitler Reincarnated" story be an example of "the hilarious"? Clearly, NO. I mean, just look at the evidence the remainder of the story lays out and you, like me, will surely be convinced that Trump is Hitler back from the grave for another go-round at world domination.

For the record, I paged down to the bottom of the article and noticed that the article is tagged as "satire". Other tags include "humor" and "insane". However, as everyone knows, if satire is your goal, the writer needs to be crystal clear about it. A LARGE disclaimer before the "satire" beings that says "this is satire" (for example). And tags or lables at the end of a commentary do not count.

That is what a dumbass named Luke Spencer told me, in any case. And he was quite insistent about it. To claim "satire" by way of Labels or Tags is what Big Liars do. In order to walk back shit they don't want to stand by. Shit they absolutely meant seriously.

So Carbonated TV was being completely serious, as am I. In fact I take their assertion that Hitler has returned as Donald Trump 154 percent seriously. Your "serious percentage" might be higher or it might be lower, but it should NOT be below 100 unless you are a #trumpdupe. You're not a #trumpdupe, are you?

DSB #66

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Donald Trump Not "Natural Born", Not A "Person" & Therefore Ineligible To Serve As POTUS

Someone posted a question on Quora that reads "Was Donald Trump really born in Zimbabwe?". What follows is an excerpt from the most up-voted answer.

Answer: I don't know for certain. But lately, lots of people are saying he was. The Celine Fnord Institute is currently funding a formal investigation. It's telling that, while he spent a good two years demanding Obama's birth certificate, we have asked and asked but Trump has never produced [his long form] birth certificate. Or his tax returns. Seems pretty fishy... what's he hiding?

Ok, sure, Trump's trying to get off this by a technicality. Trump was born in 1946... perhaps in the British African state of Southern Rhodesia? They declared Independence as Rhodesia in 1965… Trump's folks would certainly have fled the end of white rule. The black nationals were using "Zimbabwe" in the early 60s... "Rhodesia" was a name derived from the name of British colonialist Cecil Rhodes. But now it's the independent state of Zimbabwe. Trump did say "If you have a date in Southern Rhodesia she'll be waiting in Zimbabwe" in season 5 of The Apprentice (Quora question answered by Dave Haynie).

Anyone can ask, and anyone can answer a question on Quora. Quora readers select the answer they like best and vote for it. Democracy in action, and in accordance with Stephen Colbert's "view that reality can be determined by consensus opinion".

"If a majority of people want something to be true, that thing therefore must become the truth" according to Colbert. This response, having received the most upvotes, is therefore obviously true. Although the question answer does say "I don't know for certain" although "lots of people are saying he was".

That is the KEY point, I believe. People are saying Trump was born in Zimbabwe. Josh Brown says he was. Masasi Hobho says Trump was born in Morgenster hospital in Masvingo, Zimbabwe.

If Barack Obama being born in Kenya made him ineligible to serve as POTUS (even though his mother was a United States citizen), then Donald Trump being born in Zimbabwe makes him ineligible. Even if his mother was a US citizen. Remember that Donald's father is an orangutan. Trump sued Bill Maher when he reveled this truth on air, but later dropped the matter (thereby admitting Maher was right).

Orangutans (as per Wikipedia) are the two exclusively Asian species of extant great apes... native to Indonesia and Malaysia". Zimbabwe is located in Southern Africa. My guess is that Donald Trump's was born in either Indonesia or Malaysia, then emigrated to Zimbabwe and later the United States. After marrying a human woman (Mary Anne Trump née MacLeod) with whom he fathered a human-orangutan hybrid they named Donald John.

Although Wikipedia notes that Frederick "Fred" Christ Trump was born in NY and his parents were born in Germany. The answer to this discrepancy? Obviously Fred Trump is not Donald's natural father. Maybe he believed he was (Mary Anne Trump fooled him into thinking Donald was his progeny) or maybe he conspired with his wife to hide Donald's true parentage.

In any case, the point is that, having been born in Zimbabwe, Trump is not eligible to serve as US president. Barack Obama, regardless of where he was born, served 2 full terms. However, while Barack Obama produced his Hawaiian birth certificate, Donald Trump has not. He (I believe) has thus far only released the short form and not the long form of his BC. Which, as you will recall, was not good enough when Obama did the same.

OBVIOUSLY Trump is not eligible. I mean, he is not even fully human! Surely I believe we can assume that the Founders intended only a 100% fully human individual to be eligible. That is in addition to being natural born and 35 years old (as per Article 2 of the US Constitution). Note that the Constitution uses the word "person", which dictionary.com defines as "a human being".

So, I think that Trump could be removed from office for not being a person (or fully a person) and for not being natural born. That's in addition to his wife Melania being a Russian spy (DSB #63).

DSB #65

Monday, January 16, 2017

Presidency Stolen From Rightful Winner HRC (Alex Mohajer Writing For HuffPo)

Alex Mohajer, writing for the Huffington Post, says "the evidence is clear. Hillary Clinton is the rightful president-elect". His reasoning? He agrees with Rep John Lewis (SWTD #369) that, if not for Putin's "influence campaign", HRC would have won. In addition Mohajer points to FBI director Comey's meddling; a violation of the Hatch Act (SWTD #356).

Another factor Mohajer and Lewis (apparently) overlook would be Kris Kobach's Interstate Crosscheck. A voter disenfranchisement election fraud scheme (DSD #54). I think it was all three (Putin, Comey and Kasich) that contributed to HRC's "loss", and that if any of the three had not occurred HRC would be president.

Although, IMO it was Kobach that had the greatest impact. I might be wrong, but I do think that in ANY discussion of how the 2016 POTUS election was stolen, Kobach should definitely be included. Along with Putin and Comey. They were all BIG factors that point to the election being stolen.

Regarding Mohajer writing that "courts must use the broad discretionary powers with which they are vested to enjoin an illegitimate president from taking office"... I wish. But that's not going to happen, unfortunately.

I mean, gwb took office after the scotus appointed him over the rightful winner, Al Gore. Gore being another Democrat who was elected but did not serve. Election results are never reversed. Republicans know this, which is why any cheating they can pull off is "fair" as far as they are concerned.

DSB #64

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Melania Trump Is A Russian Spy & Husband Donald Is Cultivated Asset! (Confirmed 100% Factual)

Ordinarily I'd view a rumor like this one with suspicion. But I read recently that calling a story "fake news" is a "nonsensical talking point". Everyone should determine for themselves if a news story is legit or not (I assume). How? I'm not sure, but I think that if the story confirms your biases that means it is likely true.

With that in mind, when I heard that Melania Trump is a Russian spy, I went to Google and looked for a story that confirmed what I felt in my gut could be true.

Could Donald Trump, stupid man that he is, be even more of a Russian puppet than he knows? Now, we're just spitballing here, but is there somebody very close to Trump, who happens to be from a former Eastern bloc country, who is VERY PRETTY in a Hot Dour Spy sort of way, and who could have access to the deepest bowels of the Trump empire? Yes, there is! Her name is Melania Knauss Trump, and if we were doing an international spy operation, she'd be the PERFECT person to send in and cultivate a gross dude like Trump as an asset. He spends his life groping his way around hot model ladies, and he'd never imagine a sexxxy Eastern European model might fall in love with him for any reason besides HE'S DONALD TRUMP, ANY QUESTIONS? (No, For Real, Though, Is Donald Trump A Russian Intelligence Asset? by Evan Hurst. Wonkette 11/1/2016).

There is also the fact that Melaina's father was a member of the Slovenian Communist Party. She is a Russian spy! It's all so obvious. All one has to do is connect the dots.

I also read that a former spy tells FBI that Russia cultivated Trump as an asset, provides evidence. According to the former spy, "there was an established exchange of information between the Trump campaign and the Kremlin of mutual benefit".

So, the homophobic religious bigot Pence will be prez when the Donald is prosecuted and convicted of treason, I assume? Unless Congressional Republicans decide they don't care. Which, so far, seems to be the case.

DSB #63

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Is Joe Biden The Raddest VP Ever Or What?

This from the self-described "finest news source" in America.

WASHINGTON - Encouraging the group of visitors that he was showing around the Roosevelt Room to "fucking hightail it", vice president Joe Biden was reportedly stopped by "killjoy" Secret Service members Tuesday who moved quickly to shut down his unofficial White House tour. "I provide a legit service at a discount, unlike that rinky-dink official tour where you don't get to peep half as much cool-ass shit, but those glorified security guards had to go and put the kibosh on it", said Biden, who had reportedly been making some extra cash on the side by approaching groups of tourists waiting in line outside the White House and asking them if they wanted to see the "real deal", before sneaking ahead into the West Wing to check if the coast was clear.

"The actual tour is a huge ripoff, but Diamond Joe's Ultimate Sightseeing Adventure shows you stuff that's not on any map. Listen, there's some shit that Barry doesn't even know is here, and I was letting people in on it for a totally reasonable price". (Secret Service Shuts Down Biden's Unofficial White House Tour Operation, The Onion).

Now, some people say that The Onion is a "fake news" site and that their articles are actually satire. But other people say that it's intellectually bereft to parrot mainstream media buzz-words like "fake news".

You wanna be intellectually bereft? Not me. Which is I came to the conclusion that these fascists are trying to crush dissent and squash free-speech. Heck, even in the halls of Congress they seem to be hearkening back to the not so subtle fascism of tyrants such as Adams, Lincoln, and Wilson (something called the Countering Disinformation and Propaganda Act). We need to stop this shit and, yes, stay vigilant. Because you know that they will for sure.

Anyway, I say Joe Biden rocks. If this story is true, that is. Which I think it is. Because it SOUNDS like something Joe Biden (the coolest VP ever) would do. Also, there is photographic evidence (see below). In any case, do you think we should we leave it to Google, Verizon, Cable News, and Mark Zuckerberg to determine what is "fake news"? Hell no! Enough with the memorized nonsensical talking points!

DSB #62

Thursday, December 1, 2016

Garrison Keillor On Trump & Republicans

Two excerpts from recent articles by author Garrison Keillor that remind me why I like him so much (I've always been a fan of A Prairie Home Companion).

Raw ego and proud illiteracy have won out, and a severely learning-disabled man with a real character problem will be president. Alas for the Trump voters, the disasters he will bring on this country will fall more heavily on them than anyone else. The uneducated white males who elected him are the vulnerable ones, and they will not like what happens next. ...the damage he will do to our country — who knows? His supporters voted for change, and boy, are they going to get it. (Trump voters will not like what happens next. The Washington Post 11/9/2016).

He will never be my president... I don't see anything admirable or honorable about him. This sets him apart from other politicians. (How many liberals does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. The Washington Post 11/15/2016).

720×366

#notmypresident #republicanssuck SWTD#donaldtrump SWTD#notmypresident

DSB #61

Monday, October 31, 2016

Glenn Beck (A Professional Moron) Says Only Way HRC Can Win Election Now Is Actual Magic

Because of FBI Director James Comey deciding to interfere in the election (SWTD #356).

[The video that was here has been removed because it is of the type that starts loading and then plays automatically, which I HATE. I mean, I don't want this stupid video to play every time I load this page. Because I have a data cap. Go here and then scroll down a bit to view it. Stupid Beck Blaze encoders].

And, if "magic" somehow does come into play (magic favoring HRC), what we will end up with is a president Tim Kaine. Because HRC will be sent to prison, impeached and removed from office (presumably).

And remember that Glenn was for the Canadian-born religious nutjob Ted Cruz (SWTD #332). And he's said he's not voting for Trump (or Hillary). But now he says Trump has it in the bag.

Me, I doubt it. Maybe Comey's meddling will make it a tad closer, but I'm still predicting an HRC win. Some dumb-dumbs might be fooled, but why the hell should an investigation into Anthony Weiner throw the election to Trump? (BTW, among the dumb-dumbs are people like Luke Spencer, who wrote on his blog that Weiner is HRC's "pervert buddy". Yes, he seriously is THAT stupid).

But I'd say Glenn Beck still has Luke Spencer beat. Or maybe it's a toss-up. Glenn Beck has the fact that he's very wealthy (100 million net worth) going for him. He is apparently smarter than the average dumb-dumb, in that he has been able to fool the dumb-dumbs into giving him lots of money.

A 2/3/2016 Daily Beast article says some people refer to him as a "mad genius". The article then goes on to note that Beck's "media empire" is currently crumbling.

But, even if it burns down, he'll likely come out the other side a wealthy man. It isn't as if he would have to pay the $10 million The Blaze owes out of his personal fortune. At worst he'll declare bankruptcy and sell off the Blaze's assets. Possibly to the coming Trump TV network (speculated).

SWTD Tags: 2016 Election, Donald Trump, Glenn Beck, Hillary Clinton, HRC email Controversy.

DSB #60