Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Is Joe Biden The Raddest VP Ever Or What?

This from the self-described "finest news source" in America.

WASHINGTON - Encouraging the group of visitors that he was showing around the Roosevelt Room to "fucking hightail it", vice president Joe Biden was reportedly stopped by "killjoy" Secret Service members Tuesday who moved quickly to shut down his unofficial White House tour. "I provide a legit service at a discount, unlike that rinky-dink official tour where you don't get to peep half as much cool-ass shit, but those glorified security guards had to go and put the kibosh on it", said Biden, who had reportedly been making some extra cash on the side by approaching groups of tourists waiting in line outside the White House and asking them if they wanted to see the "real deal", before sneaking ahead into the West Wing to check if the coast was clear.

"The actual tour is a huge ripoff, but Diamond Joe's Ultimate Sightseeing Adventure shows you stuff that's not on any map. Listen, there's some shit that Barry doesn't even know is here, and I was letting people in on it for a totally reasonable price". (Secret Service Shuts Down Biden's Unofficial White House Tour Operation, The Onion).

Now, some people say that The Onion is a "fake news" site and that their articles are actually satire. But other people say that it's intellectually bereft to parrot mainstream media buzz-words like "fake news".

You wanna be intellectually bereft? Not me. Which is I came to the conclusion that these fascists are trying to crush dissent and squash free-speech. Heck, even in the halls of Congress they seem to be hearkening back to the not so subtle fascism of tyrants such as Adams, Lincoln, and Wilson (something called the Countering Disinformation and Propaganda Act). We need to stop this shit and, yes, stay vigilant. Because you know that they will for sure.

Anyway, I say Joe Biden rocks. If this story is true, that is. Which I think it is. Because it SOUNDS like something Joe Biden (the coolest VP ever) would do. Also, there is photographic evidence (see below). In any case, do you think we should we leave it to Google, Verizon, Cable News, and Mark Zuckerberg to determine what is "fake news"? Hell no! Enough with the memorized nonsensical talking points!

DSB #62

No comments:

Post a Comment

Comment moderation is currently NOT in effect. Although I may have to reinstate it. We'll see how it goes.